Susan Boyle

In this time of trouble, fear, the bad economy, cutbacks and lay-offs and just a general feeling of doom as we try to struggle out of this recession, comes a ray of sunshine the likes of which we haven't seen in a very long time.

I'm not a huge fan of reality shows, I'm not a huge fan of television for that matter. Seems like the only things I do watch are sitcoms like 2 1/2 men, reruns of comedies from the 80's and 90's, Judge Judy and what not to wear lol

I never watch reality shows cos I find them the lamest tv I've ever seen.

Reality sucks all on its own. We sure don't need to see people being publicly humiliated, having their dreams smashed, or being screamed at by nasty little Prima Donna chefs. Do we really need to see people's lives being torn apart by the press as in Jon and Kate? Is it like a train crash we just can't look away from?? It must be cos the ratings are high.

I've never watched American Idol or You Think You Can Dance. Being on this side of the Atlantic, I've never seen an episode of Britain's Got Talent show. However, I, like everyone else has heard about the sensation that is Susan Boyle.

I read about her and decided to go to you tube to see for myself what the hoopla was all about.

O. M. G. I was completely blown away by this woman's voice!!!!

This frumpy , middle aged, downright hideous looking woman made me cry listening to I Dreamed a Dream from Les Miserables. I couldn't breathe listening to her, tears pouring down my face and my heart just pounding as I listened.

Yesterday, again , it was on the news that she made it to the finals. I immediately went to You Tube to hear her do Memory from Cats.

Again, totally blown away!! Again with the tears. I've listened to it over and over and I can't seem to get enough of her voice. Even if god forbid, she doesn't win, in my mind, she is a winner and will go on to do great things. She is an inspiration for every middle aged, less than attractive, frumpy women in their 40's.

Appearances SHOULDN'T matter. The people who laughed at her claim that she'd like to be like Elaine Page, should be ASHAMED of themselves!! As they say, no ones laughing now.

In a world filled with trouble and trials and tribulations, this woman's voice is like a balm for the soul, and a reminder that we CANNOT judge a book by its cover.

If you haven't heard the sensation that is Susan Boyle, I strongly urge you to go to You Tube and listen to her sing. I guarantee you will walk away from the computer a little lighter in your soul.

For every woman who has been made to feel less than attractive, for every woman who's been made to feel inferior, for every woman who has felt the sting of nasty laughter and snide remarks, for every woman for whom the ideal will never be possible, Susan Boyle redeems us all. BRAVO Susan! You deserve every accolade that comes your way!!!!!


P.S. Since I am new to this blogging and I still don't know how to add a link for a website, I will simply say, go to You Tube, type in Susan Boyle and sit back and enjoy, you wont regret it!!!

Cathy

Oink Oink, it isn't the pigs spreading the disease!!

I've never been the type to panic over the type of fear-mongering that is going on right now with this out break of swine flu. I'm healthy, I eat right, I exercise regularly, drink plenty of water and somehow by the grace of god, I managed to avoid completely any illness this past winter.

That's not to say that there haven't been times when some people have tried to FORCE it on me with their lack of manners.

Case in point today. I went to the curves gym and there was a woman coughing and barking constantly. I look up to see her cough and a wad of phlegm flies out of her mouth and lands on one of the cushions on the machine...O . M . F. G !! She goes and gets a tissue, wipes it up, does NOT use the disinfectant we have there for cleaning our mats with, and the horror of horrors, I watched her put the wadded up ball of phlegm soaked tissue on the CD player!!...

Ummm, right, well I won't be touching THAT cushion, and when I did have to use that machine, I elbowed the cushion off. Used the machine and when I was at the recovery station, I hear her talking and shes saying to me that, and I quote here people, "Proper etiquette means putting the cushion to the side for the next person".

I just looked at her and toed the cushion back toward the machine. There wasn't a chance in hell I was gonna touch it lol

I said NOTHING...10 years ago, I would've ripped a strip off her right then and there cos after what I just witnessed, I would've lost it. Either I'm growing up and understanding that there are always people like that or I just can't be bothered by the drama. People like that don't see their own flaws but they can't wait to point out others.

I did tell the girl that was in charge today about it, pointed out the tissue, laughed about her having the nerve to say anything to me about etiquette after what she did and the girl says to me " I don't understand, shes a very religious, church going type of person". I just looked at her blankly, thinking, what the hell does THAT have to do with someone being a pig? Obviously in this woman's view, cleanliness is NOT next to godliness. That much is clear lol

I slathered my hands with sanitizer to the wrists and even wiped some of it around my mouth and nose, just in case. I'm not a germaphobic obsessive going around continually washing but good grief people, a little common sense here.

I think the worst part of what she did was the assumption that someone else wouldn't mind picking up a revolting dripping tissue cos she couldn't walk 8 feet to the garbage can. The nerve astounds me.

The pigs that go around spreading their germs and diseases willy nilly with no regard for anyone else are unfortunately very much of the HUMAN variety.

Sad isn't it that people are so lacking in common sense when it comes to not spreading germs that viruses spread so quickly. After that little display today it's no wonder.

Cathy

Cut backs are a BITCH!

The recession is really, really starting to have a big impact on me personally. I wrote a couple weeks about how we were having to go to 4 days a week cos we were slowing down.

How quickly things go from bad to worse.

My company has been approved for the work share program, and immediately went to 3 days a week the moment we were approved!

Employment Insurance will pay up to 55% for 3 work share days a week. To give my company credit, they did wait til they were sure we'd be approved in order to not hurt the people too badly. Even though there is no "waiting" period , which, when on regular benefits, the first 2 weeks are an UNPAID waiting period, the fact is we won't see any money from E.I. until the end of April at the earliest.

So for the next 4 weeks we have to somehow live on just over half a regular paycheck. It will be retroactive from the date of approval, so we will get a lump sum and then will regularly get benefits every 2 weeks.

Yesterday I spent hours on the phone cancelling things like my gym membership ( I can exercise in the gym room here at the condo ), called my cell company and regular phone company and switched everything down to the bare minimum and then decided to switch Internet companies cos if I go with a bundle of cell, phone and Internet, it will save me 50 dollars a month. ( I'm really not keen on this...can we say MONOPOLY??, but needs must and all that ) Cut out a few other things too and including my reduced bus fare, I've managed to shave $200.00 bucks a month from my expenses.

The local Dollerama store sells canned food, and packaged mixes so yesterday afternoon, I went over there and stocked up on stuff like soup at 2 for $1, cans of stew and noodles that the kids like to snack on for $1 each ( at the grocery, stew and raviolis and things like that are close to $2 each), paper towel, hand soap etc. that I would pay much more for, even in groceries like No Frills and Food Basics.

I was pretty upset when I found out we were going to be only working 3 days a week. I had really hoped it wouldn't come to that but the reality now is, there's a very real possibility that if things don't pick up soon, in all likelihood we will be on 2 days of work only. I sure hope it doesn't come to that but it seems likely.

In the news I read that Toronto got 9 billion dollars from the Federal Government to build 4 more Light Rapid Transit lines that will link outlying areas and link areas to the airport. The project is expected to take between 4 and 6 years and I was thinking wouldn't it be a boon to us if we got the contract for the electrical. Hope our sales is thinking the same and bust their butts to do whatever they can to snag a contract that would have the ability to save us.

I have been in worse situations, right now I'm still employed and I still have benefits and I know I'm lucky. We had more than a few times over the years where neither hubby or I were working when the kids were small. We ate a lot of ground chicken and ricearoni and homemade soups, stews, ate a lot of fillers, pinched pennies til they shrieked and we made it. Mind you, neither of my kids are big fans of ricearoni or ground chicken to this day because of it, but they ate, they had a roof and we were never reduced to using food banks. It was when I started using resale places and second hand stores for clothes for myself and for them. I also was part of a group of other moms at the school and we passed the clothes between each other as the kids outgrew them and that really helped a lot.

Although I am not happy about this downturn, I have to think logically and start deciding what is essential and what is a luxury. A person becomes accustomed to their life style and we think that luxuries are in fact essentials and in reality we can live without a lot of this. I have an answering machine as part of my phone, so why do I need a call answer service on my phone line? The answer is I don't. So I go with the one that doesn't cost extra, same with my cell phone, the people that call me know when I'm available if at work, know when I'm home, anyone else can just call back. I'm sure I will find other ways to save as well. Have to look upon this as a challenge.

But I can't stress enough to myself that it could be horribly worse. What would it be like if this was 3 years previous and we were behind on all our bills, threats to repossess the car, creditor calls constantly, the gut wrenching fear of knowing we've done it to ourselves with the drug addiction. I'm able to sleep only cos I know I am all caught up, nothing is outstanding. I was even able to change over the cell phone from my son in laws name to mine and when they ran the credit check said all is in order! What a pleasant surprise that turned out to be cos I finally had proof positive that paying every bill every month on time has repaired my credit rating. I've come too far and struggled so much to let those payments get behind again. The beauty is I've provided myself with a way out because, if worst comes to worst, our credit is so much better and $25,000 less than it was it makes it easier to consolidate things through a bank insead of killer loan companies!

So that's where things stand, I'm sad at having to give up things, I hope that like in the past, this is cyclical and things will turn around.

I used to watch the show Roseanne, cos I could really relate to it right from the beginning, the struggles, in the last year of the show there were works to the theme song. I think about these lyrics a lot.

If what doesn't kill us is makin us stronger
We're gonna last longer
Than that greatest wall in China
Or that rabbit with the drum

If there's one thing that I've learned
While waiting for my turn
Is that in each life some rain falls
But you also get some sun

And we'll make out better than OK
Hear what I say?
Yeah, any day.

There's something about those lyrics that pull at my heart, we WILL make it but boy , life's curve balls suck at times.

To wrap up this post that has turned into a freaking NOVEL on an up note, next Friday is Good Friday and I will be celebrating my youngest daughter turning 21, a bit belated celebration for my son in law who turned 30!!! on April 1st and Easter of course with a dinner and 2 cakes for the birthday people, both celebrating milestone birthdays. ( This is the child I despaired of being able to raise past the age of 10 as I was sure she'd end up killing herself with her tomboy ways lol)

It's always fun and silly when we get together and someone pulls out the latest theme to take goofy pictures of each other wearing the latest lol

So life goes on, just in a different direction, guess I'm being forced into enjoying the simple life and ya know, that can't be a bad thing in the end can it?

Cathy

Customer service at it's finest....

Did I miss something? Was yesterday the annual "Be Ignorant to Customers Day?

For my birthday, hubby gave me a 50 dollar gift certificate for Value Village so my friend Sue and my daughter Jenn decided to go spend it.

We started off just after 9 am. First stop was the location in the next town..it's a little more well to do neighborhood and the donations are better quality. ( I once got a down filled coat in excellent condition for 12 bucks!!!)

At this point it was fun and we were having a laugh about my friend Sue badgering Jenn into tryin clothes on.

I turned around and walked down the aisle to grab something and almost fell over...my motherinlaw...!..gak, no way did I want to even acknowledge that I'd seen her cos where she is the evil sisterinlaw is sure to be close behind ( and from now on in this story shall be referred to as simply "THE EVIL")

I booked it back to the change rooms and hissed at Jenn, Omg they're here! So shes laughing and saying "Wow, I cant believe we didn't sense THE EVIL or see the little black cloud and I'm moon walking backwards so I don't have to even look at them..hee hee

And here is customer service scenario one.

We approach one of the cashes..Woot! No one in the line up!..Where a guy is standing doing something involved with the cash and I say (and I know, I know, dumb customer questions)

Are you open? He looks at me with this long suffering look (keeping in mind at this point its like 10 am) and sneers at me "I'll let you figure that out...

me:....*blink blink*...OK, I'll take that as a yes and I start loading the stuff on the counter.

Charming clerk starts barking at a woman behind me "Are you returning that? Give it to me and go shopping. She's all, well what about my refund and he barked and I mean barked at her, NO REFUNDS, NO STORE CREDIT, EXCHANGES ONLY!

I rolled my eyes at Jenn and we continued talkin about THE EVIL.

Charming clerk interrupts when he sees I've got gift certificates. He barks at me that no change is given, I must spend the whole amount. I said yea sure so it came to 32. I had 2 20 and one 10 dollar certificate so at least I didn't get burned for 18 bucks!! I said, I'll give you the 2 in cash and we continued talkin, Jenn then says, "At least your dressed decently(this is in observation of the fact that THE EVIL believes me to be white trash lol) Charming clerk actually turns and looks me up and down!! OMG, I burst out laughing and said "See even the clerk has to make sure !" What a hoot, it was 10 am and this guy was ALREADY having a bad day, but we cracked that military attitude and as we were leaving he hands me a card for a discount and actually smiled and said stay out of trouble lol

Customer service scenario 2

We decide to take the bus back to Mississauga and visit an area that has 4 or five resale stores in the same 4 block area.

First stop, Goodwill. Supposed to be a "red tag" sale, all clothing with a red tag is 1 dollar. We get to the cash and the woman says the jeans Jenn found aren't one dollar even tho it clearly had a red tag. She was rude and snotty and Jenn was fooorious. Turns out the plastic piece that holds the actual tag was what they referred to but and this is a BIG but, we weren't rude and we were right, there was a big red tag on the pants, it should have been honoured just because of the confusion. That's what customer service is all about. Maybe a mistake on their part but having worked in retail and Jenn working in retail, we both know that the way this woman spoke to us isn't acceptable and most places will honor things like that.

Customer service scenario 3

At this point it was decided to go to the Tim Horton's for lunch. It was like a million degrees in there, we ordered, sat down, Jenn unwraps her sandwich and says omfg look at this! I so wished I'd brought my camera cos this wasn't a sandwich, it was a mass of lumps of egg mushed all over the OUTSIDE of the bun! lol Wasn't even edible. I took it back this time cos Jenn was already in meltdown mode over the goodwill clerk. I was nice and just requested a new one and this time on a plate as we were sitting in. No problem at all they apologized and replaced it.

She was still pissed but then a couple Polish guys in the line up started bitching loudly about how slow they were. We started giggling cos it was nice to see it wasn't just us that was having trouble with customer service this day lol

Customer service scenario 4

Onward to the next store, another resale but couldn't use my certificates there and ended up spending money anyway. Again Sue was haranguing Jenn to try stuff on and ended up buying her a couple things. I said OK I'm going to use the washroom and pulled my cart to where Sue was standing and the little Asian lady that was manning the change room area almost had a heart attack and thought we were tryin to sneak more clothes into Jenn lol I just looked at her and said "Relax, I just want my friend to watch the cart" sheesh....

Maybe it was because it was a beautiful 55 degree sunny day, the first real nice taste of the end of winter and they were stuck having to deal with customers but still I think they all need to attend a few seminars to learn how to talk to people that pay their wage. Ya catch more bees with honey and all that...ya give vinegar and your gonna get it back .

Customer service means eating shit and smiling til you get it all down. If you work in retail that's the first rule. May not be fair and sure lots of people are assholes..been there, but if you want return business then you do what you need to to make sure the experience is a positive one.

I ended up having to buy a pair of shoes because by that time it was after 230 and the shoes I had on were KILLING my feet! Onward to the next store and for once we didn't have a hassle with clerks and ended the day on a positive note.

Did I say ended?? Not quite. We still had to go grocery shopping so I called hubby to come get us and we dropped Sue off at yet another store near her home, ( this woman is 50 and she can go for hours shopping! )and headed to the grocery store. By the time we got there I'd been sitting for 30 mins after having been walking and shopping for 6 hours in shoes that killed my feet and I could barely get out of the car!! Both of us were hobbling and I can hear Sue snickering to herself...amatuers....lol

I came home, moaned and groaned and soaked my feet and put two pairs of thick socks on cos just walking in slippers my poor poor feet were BURNING lol

All worth it in the end, was a good "girls day out"

Cathy

Aging gratefully

So, I'm 48 today. 48?! Can I really be a mere 2 years from 50?? How can this be when I don't feel that I've really grown up yet!

Maybe I still associate being 50 as being old. It's really not as far as it feels to me cos I don't feel old. And yet 50?!? It doesn't feel like I've lived close to 50 years. Whats up with that? Why does it take til we hit the mid century mark to realise how fleeting life is and that we should make the most of it?

This very easily could've become a poor me post , I'm old, I hate my life boohoo, blah, blah, fucking blah, but a tragedy has put it in a whole new perspective.

A very dear friend of mine lost her 18 year old son in a horrific accident involving a train yesterday. 18...it's all I keep repeating to myself...18 ..his life just beginning, how fast a split second chance occurrence took the life of this young man. My heart breaks for my friend and his twin sister and his youngest sister.

His life snuffed out before he had a chance to live it.

And I have the audacity to whine? If my life were to end this moment, at the very least, I could say I lived it. I have much more to be thankful for than I ever realised.

Time to put on the big girl panties and appreciate what I have, what I've accomplished, and cherish the time a little more carefully and when the kids come for lunch to help celebrate my birthday, I'll be hugging them a little tighter and letting go of the down side of aging and live it the way it's supposed to be lived!

Happy Birthday to me and hopefully many many more!

Cathy

Updated finally!

It's certainly been awhile. Blogging is very new to me and it isn't that I don't have anything to say, or that events don't happen...maybe I'm just lazy, don't quite know why I can't seem to take to blogging and if not write every day, I should at least make the effort to update a couple times a week.

Well I'll try to update since then in random bits.

February was mostly a write off, just trying to get through what feels like the longest month of the winter even though its the shortest month of the year. We had a very cold winter. I hope we're past the worst of it. Family day, created last year to give those of us in Ontario a mid winter long weekend, was a wash out compared to last year. Last year the whole family went sledding and had a huge lasagna dinner. This year half the family was sick , the temps had risen melting the snow so the girls and I took my grandson swimming instead. Everyone had the same idea cos it was packed! Came back and barbq'd burgers for dinner.

March first I saw something odd. I was coming back from the store, and I saw, sitting on the fence outside the condo, 3!! robins!!
I have never seen robins that early, so I came upstairs and googled to find out if they migrate and sure enough, they do. So what were they doing back so early? I've yet to see or HEAR any blue jays and they usually appear around the same time as the robins. Then on Friday, I saw a whole flock of robins. They must know something we don't. The weather has been milder with a few days that were bone chilling, but we're on the downside of winter now, thank god!

The recession is finally making itself felt here in Canada. My company is having to go to 4 days a week by the end of this month cos the work has just dried up overnight it seems. It manufactures aluminum and copper electrical connectors and with no housing starts in the states and the economy in the state it is, all of a sudden everyone is scared. We were all made to take any remaining vacation time before the end of the month.
They have applied to Employment Insurance for the work share program. We will work 32 hours a week and E.I. will pay 55 % of the remaining 8 hours. Which isn't great but I should just shut up and be glad it's in place but it still means I will lose close to $280 a month. Again, though, I know there are people way worse off and I should be grateful I even have a job but it still sucks.

The strip mall on the corner of the street I live on had a fire on
Tuesday, the restaurant had some kind of explosion happen in the wee hours. I didn't hear anything but when I looked out, it was still dark and they had the whole road closed off and 10 firetrucks and all kinds of cops and ambulances. The mall is still closed and will be for a while. J and I walked past there yesterday and I had a look in the surrounding stores and there's a lot of smoke and water damage and even the store at the opposite end of the mall still reeked even with front and back doors open. What a huge hassle to have to get rid of all your stock and have to order new..an insurance nightmare I'm sure.

Friday, I had my last vacation day and so picked up my grandson from the daycare early and we went to the park. It was a gorgeous early spring day, still cool but blazing sunshine and no clouds. The dog got ahold of some kids ball and just went nuts rolling it and chasing it and barking at it. She ran through the grass, which was literally covered in goose shit, then through the sand. She's a shitzu, with longish hair and she was covered in sand, dirt and shit. Hubby picked us up from the park and I was grateful cos after all that running she wouldn't have wanted to walk home and there was no way in hell I was gonna carry a shit covered dog lol As soon as I put her in the bath, the water turned a lovely brackish green colour. I ended up using J's shampoo and conditioner on her and wow did she ever come clean and when they were here yesterday, she still smelled nice. I really don't like the way dogs smell and it's why I don't have one but if ya use people shampoo, it keeps the doggy "aroma" away longer!

Sunday, I was out on the balcony trying to figure out how all the excess cement is gonna come off the railings from when the brick Restoration guys were here last year, looks like it will end up bringing up the paint when its removed. Anyway I looked down and there across the road from me was some young black guy, 3 cop cars and the cops were searching the kid, emptying all his pockets and then put him in the back of the cruiser. I had 2 thoughts about that. One is this, the kid wasn' t resisting arrest, so was it overkill to have 3 cop cars there and were there 3 cos he was black? or was it a case of erring on the side of caution cos had he been armed and resisting 3 wouldn't have been enuff? Did they run his name and then request back up? Just wondering, but will never know for sure.

This is for the most part a pretty quiet residential area but bad things happen everywhere, I suppose that nowhere is ever really safe.

Last week of afternoons and possibly the last week of 5 days for awhile. I hope it picks up, I hope things turn around soon. It's spring and a time for new beginnings, its easy to have hope in your heart when the weather is mild and the sun is bright!

Cathy

Guilt

Apparently the service yesterday went off without any clashes or verbal sparring, although my hubby's brother gave him and J the "evil glare of death." That brother along with his sister are the ones that spew the venom, his other 2 brothers pretty much stay out of it.

J told me her Nana said to her "Maybe someday we can put this all behind us like water under the bridge." W..T..F ?!?!
This is not J's fault, was she asking for forgiveness? I'm not sure. I think the old woman, at this stage of her life, is having regrets. And the cynical hurt part of me says it's too little too late.

The part that makes me mental is trying to understand, being a gramma myself, how any woman could willingly avoid her grandchild? Is it partly because I have only one grandchild? The fact that she has 8 grandchildren and out of that number she sees only 4 of them? Hubby's venom spitting brother has 2 that his ex wife doesn't let him see or not very often anyway. His ex is like me in we couldn't believe how shit works in this family. Neither one of us wanted to be held under the thumb of our mother in law. If you give up control to her, everything is fine. It's when you don't that you become person non grata and you and your family become nonentities.

And NOW she has regrets???

Nothing and no one, no matter what they try to do, could keep me from my grandson. Family is supposed to be precious and children are hurt easily. To be rejected because Nana and mom had a problem isn't fair and then I look back and wonder how this could've been handled better and I know I did try. I would've let her see them any time no matter how I personally felt about her just because they ARE her grandchildren but she never took advantage and judging by how many times I invited them and her and how many times they said no, which was all the time, I guess I just gave up.

Ya know, I'm not a religious person at all, but I always thought that to be a good person , you must treat other people the way you'd like to be treated, no matter what your personal feelings on the person were. I've tried to make that my life's motto. It's not always possible but you got to try. That means SMILE while eating SHIT and keep smiling til you get it all down.

I think she's finding out now that life is indeed very short. Hard lesson to learn at this stage of the game. If she wants to see the kids she'll call. I wonder how much of this is, not so much she wants to actually see them and be a part of their life, but is it the fact that she doesn't want to die knowing her own grandchildren don't know her or is it she doesn't want to go to her grave knowing what she did to these kids with her indifference? I don't know , it's made me crazy over the years trying to figure out the psyche of these people.

What a waste huh?

Cathy